Welcome Back!

Welcome back! is what I say when a client couple has completed a round of therapy in a previous year or quarter, and feels the need to return for more work.

Coming back for more counseling need not be seen as a confirmation of failure, but rather as the desire to go deeper and further as a couple - or in the case of an individual, as a whole person.

As with any intense training or learning, there can be a need to pull away and rest, or focus on application. Some couples and individuals do better with keeping a regular schedule of therapy, like a "maintenance" level, and others do intense work for several sessions, then back away for a spell.

As a therapist, I flex easily with these kinds of varying needs. You get to set your own pace in this work.

Sometimes clients are returning because of a new crisis or rising issue, and some actually come back for something like a wellness check up as a preventative measure.

Now that school is back in session, with summer travel and outdoor events receding behind us, I say to you, Welcome back!

What is the real reason?

Have you ever had an argument/discussion with your partner, only to realize that all that intensity and disagreement was really about something else? For example, you have a heated debate about who left the garage door open, and when all is said and done, you are left feeling like something was completely left out.

I often refer to interactions that we all have with other people as being on several levels. At the very least, you have the surface issue, which is usually about the circumstances. Possibly there are times when exchanges between people are mostly just plain and simple--on this level. But I'm sure you've all had the experience of knowing for a fact that this discussion really isn't about who did the dishes.

Perhaps the next level concerns trust. Can you count on the other person to do what he or she said they would do? Can you count on their word? Or maybe it's about control. Who is the dominant partner, and in what areas? Possibly it's a simple personality difference.

These situations make for great introductions in a therapy session. Often by starting with a simple incident that took place recently, we can unravel some of the underlying causes of discord or discontent between partners and other family members.

To find out more about the therapy work I do, go to my main website, http://www.sunraycounseling.com/ and check out the FAQ page, or sign up for my free "31 Ways to Brighten Your Life." Or give me a call at 425 652-1413.

Catch you later!

Creative Relationships, here we come!

Welcome to my blog on creating better and more satisfying relationships!

One of my favorite things to do in this world is to help couples with their communication challenges. Couples meet me in my office in Issaquah for weekly 50 minute sessions (in most cases), and we dive right in to whatever is ailing them.

Of course, we do start out with the requisite paper work which includes a brief intake form, and a longer disclosure statement, so that you, the client, know your rights in this kind of setting. I take every consideration to protect your confidentiality, and make sure you understand what the exceptions are (for example, by law I am a mandated reporter if I suspect child abuse).

After the formalities, I invite people to relax and start wherever they feel the greatest need. Many times, this is a first time to the counselor scenario, and I like to tell folks that coming to see me as a therapist is like having a heartfelt conversation. The more you feel you can trust the counselor you have chosen, the better the work we can do.

Please visit my website http://www.sunraycounseling.com/ and read the Frequently Asked Questions page. If you have any questions that are not answered there, please email me sheryl@sunraycounseling.com and I will be happy to help!


More later!

(PS I do see individuals as well as couples!)